He speaks. Part 1

Over the last several months, we have been in a season of waiting. My sweet husband is working a job that serves us well in the meantime, but we know it is not a long term job. To say we are grateful for this job would be a severe understatement! God is so in tune with what we need, even when we don't know it. As we have been 'waiting on the Lord' to direct our path, we have been so thankful even though we can't see what lies ahead. Jon's current job was given to him by a friend of ours who owns a company in our hometown. Jon works in the lab mixing chemicals (he wears the body suit and goggles). He goes to work at 6 and works until 2:30. Most days he picks Price up from school at 3:10 p.m. During wrestling season, he officiates in the evenings on Mondays, Tuesdays, Thursdays, Fridays and all day on Saturdays.

Through our season of waiting, I have done a lot of praying. On a Wednesday, December 28th I believe it was, I was praying in the shower. I call the shower my prayer closet. I do A LOT of praying in the shower! I was asking God, maybe lamenting a bit; talking to him about wanting direction; wanting to see His hand moving in our uncertainty. I asked "God, should I be fasting? What should I fast? How long? What should I do so I can hear your voice clearly in my life and in our season of waiting? Lord, do you hear my prayers?"

The next day, I was sharing with Jon how through the uncertainty of knowing what God had in store for our future, I have not ever felt fearful of the unknown. Later that night I woke from a terrible dream about a snake slithering around my feet. I remember saying in my dream "if the snake bites me on my foot, I will lose my foot. If it bites me on my hand, I will lose my hand..." Adrenaline was racing through my veins. My heart was beating fast. Instantly, I fears went from dreaming about a scary snake, to things that were completely irrational. Fears for my children's health, my health, our safety and lives. Crazy things that I don't normally think about. A spirit of fear had overcome me. Knowing immediately that this type of fear was NOT of God, I reached for my iphone on the nightstand. I opened my Bible app. The bright screen made me squint my eyes as I adjusted to its light. At the top of the screen it said "The Daniel Fast" Knowing I needed God's word to calm me, I tapped the scripture reading; never mind how I ended up on a Bible Plan for a 21 day Fast! Daniel chapter 10. Daniel sees a vision of a messenger. It frightens him (I could relate to that at the moment). In verse 10 the vision touches Daniel, and in verse 12 he says "Don't be afraid, Daniel. Since the first day you began to pray for understanding and to humble yourself before your God, your request has been heard in heaven. I have come in answer to your prayer." Oh my goodness!! Chills ran down my arms and back. These are God's words to me in response to my prayer yesterday!.....

Verse 14 "Now I am here to explain what will happen to your people in the future, for this vision concerns a time yet to come." Verse 19 "Don't be afraid, for you are very precious to God. Peace! Be encouraged! Be strong!"

I felt the ever present Holy Spirit comfort me in my fear. It seemed more than that even. A calm and a peace indescribable washed over me. I re-read the passage; and again. I was shocked and humbled and amazed at how personal God is. HE SAW ME IN MY FEAR. He came with his Holy Spirit to comfort ME. I fell asleep picturing God being aware of everything (even bad dreams) that concerns me. I slept soundly in His love that night. I woke excited to read the next day's devotion of the Bible plan I had 'stumbled' upon at midnight. Just 2 days ago I had been asking God in the "prayer closet" if I should be fasting. He obviously answered with a resounding "Yes, child!" And so it began.....